confusing, annoying, and so najis

HOLA I'm getting away from my orientation task, which is...... making an analysis of the direction and rotation speed of motor dc with IC L293D. what is that? that is, shit. I got into this department by accident. and Im still hoping that this accidental destiny will lead me somewhere...... because I'm completely blind, if we're talking about electronical electrical things, AND THAT IS EXACTLY THE AREA WHERE I AM GONNA BE STANDING ON FOR 4 YEARS AHEAD, department of electrical engineering, which is now kind of a hell to me. no, its not that bad actually. I still can handle this. with the power of the moon, I will punish you, physics.

SO just wish me luck. I'm in the best university in the country, fortunately. and that is something!

yoohoo

ergh, i always feel so sick everytime I read my own writings. I dont know, they are just incredibly terrible. I should practice more often.

anyway. I'M GOING TO COLLEGE. yes. finally. after a series of disgusting rejections. you know, I failed in getting into my dream college, ITB. I tried to get there twice and I got rejected, twice. Seeing my friends have got accepted in their desired university that time, it felt..... I dont know. I tried to feel happy for them but the jealousy just kept coming and haunting me :''0 I walked out of twitter and facebook (but not plurk) and then I was rejected again, twice, by Unpad and UNS. In the middle of my deadly sorrow, my mother kept telling me not to just surrender to those shits happening. then I tried to have one more entrance test, SIMAK UI, which was really famous of being SO hard to pass. but voila I made it. I'm a yellow guy! I'll study computer engineering. And yeah UI's rank is above ITB's. I went back saying hi to twitter and yeah I still felt not right because some of my friends still had not got their aimed universities.

okay. I dont know if I should be excited to be a student of the-second-best-university-in-Indonesia but you know....... it still feels so hard to realize that I'm not in ITB and (no offense) my friends whose achievements are under mine are happily there. I dont know, they seem like just getting their places effortlessly. Im not saying that I'm not grateful and stuff but yeaaaa you know what I mean, to have such a dream to get into a college and not get it at the end. I still can try next year though...... but I dont think it will happen. I should think of the money my parents have spent for UI things.

and on Saturday I will start having an activity in UI. We, Maba (Mahasiswa Baru, or New College Students) are meant to sing for our graduating seniors on graduation day. and on Saturday we will start practicing. then on 12 I will get through ospek ergh. For you who dont know, Ospek, or orientation for new students, in Indonesia is rather identical to assasination (no, just kidding) but yeaah its like, being scolded by seniors, having given bunch of tasks with a very tight deadline. and to me, it kills, although I kinda enjoyed being treated like that (?) (you wont understand)

well.......... just wish me luck cause I need to try to learn to love my new surroundings. Bye! happy fasting!

blah

im a sloppy person. yeah enough said, im tired. btw i hate seeing one of my friend's tweets. she always talks about her organization, uses too much "." like this......... it just makes her tweets hard to read. and the most unpleasant thing to even think about is her theories about this and that, about school, about blah, rgh she always talks as if she's an expert, as if she's 30 or something hkhhkh i know i shouldnt care too much about someone's stuff but hfffff enough with your snotty ideas on twitter. (how could an idea be snotty, idc)

fff

man, losing bestfriends is one heck of a shit. i hate this. when you lost your bestfriend, its like you didnt have any friends anymore. when he became a stranger, everyone became strangers as well. i cant stand this feeling anymoooore *singing*

okay this feeling came up to my mind and ruin my whole world firstly because of this exhausting and sad feeling that my friend didnt like (or even appreciate) me and my other friend's video we made for his birthday present. not a big deal? f. here's the thing. i have three bestfriends, we've been together for almost 3 years *kek org pacaran* and last year, two of them went to USA cause they two got into an exchange students program and so on bla3 and this guy im talking about is one of them that is currently in USA. before they went there, everytime one of us had a birthday, we always made a verycool present, one that is really really cool and cool and cool and super niat. and when they got in USA, theres nothing me and my friend (the one that stays here) can do but making them videos.

and this time, we're facing ujian praktek which makes our life more miserable than before. seriously, we're exhausted, I look like a beggar right now. 2 super tiring week. and because of that, we lack of time to make one supervideo, so we *that was megatired* forced ourselves to make one, and finally with blood and tears, the video has finished.

and since i posted the video on our blog yesterday morning (yeah we got one blog for the 4 of us. sweet?) he havent said anything yet BUT he has replied a video posted by his other friends on facebook he said he likes it he can cry blah3 but he said NOTHING on our blog, not even a thanks :''''''( i hate you, if i knew that it would be like this, i'd go to bed and make nothing for you. i love my body and i was so tired but you were my best friends so i forced myself but congrats you barely give a damn~ goodbye

BOREDOM STEALS SANITY

HEY IM BORED AND I KNOW AS A 12 GRADER I NEED TO STUDY AND BLAH BUT IM SO TIRED OF PUTTING ANYTHING INTO MY BRAIN BECAUSE IT KEEPS TELLING ME THAT IT'S TIRED TOO SO I LISTEN TO IT AND DECIDE TO GIVE IT A REST AND NOW I DONT KNOW WHAT TO DO!!!

btw ive been searching for a tutorial of how to make an altered book. I need to make 2 for my friends, I heard that it should be made of a book with stitches not glues. but I havent got right mood to start looking for some. my friend told me to try senen or idk, i forgot. and i dont know if i will be able to manage my time between doing these books and studying oh hell.

my moms coming home todayyyyyyy. this morning she texted me that she was already on the plane and was going right back here. but til now im still home alone, doing nothing but abusing my internet connection. i need one decent holiday and i know it'll come, i know i'll be going to spore with my bestfriends in months so i just need to be more patient.

i have done my class photo session for our yearbook and i think the result will be not as good as i thought it would........ idont know maybe because my own photo didnt turn out really great, it was really disappointing, for me. i looked like an alay and i REALLY hate looking at it. errrrgh i wish i were an indian -not indian india but indian indian get it? idc. being an indian will be much more cool than being a guy from 1920's in a train. oh well.

i need to get going, will study biology. i wont flunk my test on friday so toodlezzzzz guyzzzzz

Randummy

HUHU I MISS MY OLD LYFFF (uhlay) I miss my friends, my position as schools organizations official, my BESTFRIENDS OF ALL TIME AAAA so first year of hischool I got 3 superbestfriends then 2nd year I got my 2nd family from an organization plus I was the chairman and the last year which is now I lost them all but I got this obligation to study everyday everynight everybody dance now~ *singing* SERIOUSLY I need some quality time (ew did I sound like nowadays erratic teenager) I am miserable and I need to see everybody around me miserable too! Although it wont help anything. I even forgot to bring my sweater along with me to school yesterday, it was really a doomed day, I got nothing to hug and squeezed so I squeeze my desk and it was not one good squeezable pleasure (?) idk what's going on but I need a long session of weeping. Like lemony snicket said, you know it can make you feel better, even if your circumstances havent changed one bit. Totally true its like detaching this staples from one bitter broken heart.... #norelation wkwk and its odious to see people who try to keep themselves look handsome or pretty or cool whatever the truth is they are not. So why trying so harddddd. let it go. I hate you my friends :) *sarcasm only works when its followed by a smile* wait is that even a sarcasm? Uh what else, I need a decent holiday.....

heyyy

HEYYYYYY I just finished watching cirque du freak. i think it means circus of freak, like cirque du soleil, no?

and i just realized something. if i am asked like
"what do you wanna be?"
i will answer
"a vampire."
well im not a huge fan of twilight, i even havent seen new moon and eclipse (has it been released yet? idc) but yeah vampires are sick they are cool and i think i wanna be one of them. but i changed my mind because thats pretty much like "i wanna be dead and drink blood" but heck, vampires are cool (here i said it again) they have cold skin (i think) and sharp eyes, i wanna have grey eyes. but i dont like and never think of wearing softlenses aewwwww. they can move faster than us human and they seem so cool so there will be many girls chasing after me mehehehe jk.

btw today i went to kemang, to costumescloset and i bought some fake moustaches. cool. i planned to search for masinis costume actually. masinis is masinis you know wakaka as you know my vocabs are miskin and im too lazy to open dictionary. yeah they drive trains. thats for my yearbook photoshoot heckyeah i'll be so cool but thats only if i can find the costume.

and junior masterchef was awesome. i was rooting for several kids but none of them went to top 20 :/ did i bring bad luck to them by giving my support? sorry then.

i gotta get to sleep because tomorrow's monday and that means flag ceremony, congrats have a blast bye